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The Bloom is Off

The magnificent lily that glowed  and grinned like a tiger has dropped her blooms and hidden herself for the year. I have the plant, still healthy, and the memory of her beauty and presence --- and a bit of sadness. It is a similar sadness to the way I miss certain friendships that have faded. One I am thinking of particularly now has lingered on my mind of late. I long to be in touch, but when one loves, one waits and carries on. The other may have found new attachments, or distractions, or his or her own overwhelming circumstances, and the bloom is off the rose (or lily), so to speak. We feel forgotten. There's some chance we are, isn't that humbling?

There's a better chance we are remembered like the tiger lily who once shone so brightly in the life of our absent friend. We are like a softer painting of that lily now in memory., perhaps...

(painting by Judith Travis)

It's also possible that we flatter ourselves, and the ego says, "I want to be remembered." My friend Alan Mitnick wrote the following poem about the wish to be remembered:


I don't want as much to be remembered, as just forgotten slowly, one day the mailman bringing a different name on cards & bills to this door

Tonight I'm listening to a singer live in Ireland, giving a show through DeBarra's Folk Club, a good fellow on banjo, and it has lifted my spirits so much. He sings sad songs and joyful ones, and songs of memory, and they all soothe me. You can listen sometime via the Facebook page they host.

Something I have been learning from my Buddhist studies is that the ego has such a powerful hold. If we can replace our need to be loved and adored and applauded with compassion for others and a spirit of openness with no clutching, we can be happier and probably do much more good with our lives.

The current song by the Irish performer is "Time for Us to Leave Her," which is actually about leaving a ship, I think... or a job, or a place --- not about leaving a person, but isn't it right for me, and for this post?

I'll take my leave of ya, and you needn't remember me at all. :>) But do come around if you think of it...

Tamara

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